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8/17/2013 5:05:40 PM
5/3/2013 9:30:57 AM
Things that should happen in any Batman Rule 341-Batman is classified as a furry(when you think about it, its kind of canon)2-Batman says "Quick Robin, get the Bat-Condom/Bat-Spermicide/Bat-Vibrator3-If Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn are present, there must be lezzing out4-When the context calls for it, Bane will say "then you will have my permission to climax"5-Superpowers should be used for...recreational purposes6-"I'm Batman" is the pick-up line before a sex scene. "I'm the Goddamned Batman" is Batman's sex noise7-When planning to sex, Batman will say "Quick, to her Bat Cave!"8-The Joker, proving how evil he is, will break the fourth wall and point out how pathetic and perverted humanity is, how sex and drugs and pleasure in itself is just a distraction for our meaningless existence and that in the end we'll be forgetten in a cosmic corpse of cold, dead suns.
9/28/2012 1:22:37 PM
Another fine review. You would think a Bat parody would at least poke fun at a rich guy pushing 40 who lives with a teenage boy, yet denies he's Bat-curious. -Many missed opportunities in this film.
9/24/2012 5:19:46 PM
I don't care what anybody sais, the Bane voice was Awesome!
9/21/2012 1:55:09 AM
Waaaaaait, unless there's something important left out there, did the people making this movie assume that people will generally want to happily wank along to the Joker raping someone? That seems like a very strange, and frankly very, VERY creepy thing to (apparently) just take for granted like that.
12/3/2012 3:33:21 AM
yeah that disturbed me too.
9/19/2012 12:14:22 AM
Clearly they are using parody to get around copyright law rather than actually making a parody. Pity. Porn rarely has that kind of production values.
9/17/2012 10:29:52 PM
The female characters can wear the same costumes they wear in the comics in a porno and not look out of place.
9/20/2012 12:34:46 PM
Reason #367 to love Black Widow, courtesy of Scarlett Johansson, “We need SOME superheroine out there that doesn’t just fight in a bra.”
9/25/2012 7:20:59 PM
Yes! Because catsuits are equally sexy!
9/26/2012 12:28:01 PM
Well, exactly. And much more practical. And warmer.
9/26/2012 3:48:20 PM
So no one wants Powergirl to appear in the new superman franchise?
9/27/2012 9:23:52 AM
Ah Powergirl.. straddling that line between male fantasy and empowered woman. How I love your tenacity, your independence, your massive boobs.
9/27/2012 10:05:38 AM
Mister, you just named one of my favorites.
9/17/2012 8:29:22 PM
Great review. :)
9/17/2012 3:16:43 AM
I don't understand, given the subject matter he works with, how Axel Braun's films can be so... JOYLESS.
9/17/2012 6:47:02 AM
I know! And there's such potential to actually parody The Joker and Bane. I want to see how Bane goes shopping. Wandering through Tesco and then getting annoyed when the person at the cheese counter can't understand him.
9/17/2012 9:35:49 AM
Batman and Robin themselves, all the fun you can make of them."No you don't understand, I am an ORPHAN, and therefore, I have decided to become and avenger of the night, a cry for justice, for all those who lost their mommy and daddy.. mommy.... i'm Batman." "But Batman, i'm an orphan to.""You still don't understand how it feels!" "holy smokes Batman!" or we could also just steal jokes from Colleague humour, or holy Batman the musical, or you know what-ever. All the greatest stuff is actually sort of easy to parody with the right mind, how does so many poeple get it that wrong?
9/17/2012 8:17:26 PM
Or the Scarecrow wondering around somewhere while people wonder where the Tin Man and Lion are, the REAL reason he became a villain.
9/25/2012 11:02:17 AM
Or Bane working AT a cheese counter?"It doesn't matter who we are, what matters is our cheese"
9/17/2012 3:03:26 AM
Great review. Perhaps Braun went with "parody" in the legal sense, so he could use the characters without getting sued?
9/17/2012 6:45:07 AM
That's exactly it. He's basically making a fan film!
12/3/2012 3:59:46 AM
I know, it's like the sex scenes are an afterthought for him.
9/17/2012 2:15:27 AM
9/16/2012 11:16:04 PM
Great review man, I was laughing the whole damn time! =)
9/16/2012 2:30:37 PM
I can't believe I haven't commented on the theme song. It's schmexy! Anyways, how does a film parody of batman where they make obscure DC comic references to Hellblazer and The Killing Joke manage to miss the point of Batman?!
9/16/2012 12:18:06 PM
Your Bane voice sounds more like Matt Berry.
9/16/2012 1:21:34 PM
They are very similar. I've been doing my Matt Berry voice for years and now whenever I try it goes straight to Bane! I would like to hear Bane to voiceovers for Absolute Radio though.
9/16/2012 9:45:17 AM
Lol, this review was hillarious. Story time with bane.. you could make that into your own special.
9/16/2012 10:10:12 AM
How does Bane eat?
9/16/2012 10:25:44 AM
I don't know... energy drinks through a straw?
9/16/2012 3:19:43 PM
Didn't he have those tubes of green stuff? (At least in some of the comics and in Batman & Robin)I think the more important question is Batman often pulls all-nighters (fighting crime that is, not having sex), how does he...go? Does the Batmobile also function as a port-a-potty? Does he leave small pellets around like actual bats? Does he wear a Bat-Diaper? That question has always plagued me for a while.
9/16/2012 7:49:04 PM
9/16/2012 2:29:26 PM
If you go by the comics, he just takes off his mask and eats.
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