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Italian Stallion (1970)
on Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Warning: This review is not safe for work, unless you work at a place that's okay with you watching shots of Stallone's balls. And ass. So much Stallone ass...
It's Italian Stallion, the infamous softcore porno starring Sylvester Stallone that was re-released when he hit it big with Rocky. Originally titled The Party at Kitty and Stud's, the movie is about a New York City couple (Kitty and Stud) who have sex, engage in light S&M, then invite some of their friends over for an orgy. The end. Features a special guest appearance by our own Cheap-Arse Film Critic, and also director Dick Bush, who unveils a new app that helps you do it like a pornstar!
The Stewardesses 3-D (1969)
“Don’t dismiss it as ‘just a sex movie’. This historically significant film helped usher in the flight attendant as an iconic figure in pop culture. It rode the wave of the cresting sexual revolution. It serves as a chronicle of the advancement of women in the workforce. And yes, I suppose, there is that small matter of it being the first 3-D porn film in history. ”Avengers XXX: A Porn Parody (2012)
What better way to start off a new show than with Vivid's porn parody of the biggest film of the summer? Starring Dale DaBone as Iron Man, Brooklyn Lee as the Black Widow, ex-wrestler Chyna as She-Hulk, and many others, this is a movie that strangely enough includes way more Marvel characters than the actual Avengers movie.Busty Cops 2 (2006)
“MikeJ helps the Porn Critic review Busty Cops 2! Will it answer all the unanswered questions from the first Busty Cops? We don't know, but the talking llama is back, and this time there's a CGI whale! Also in this episode: special cameos from Welshy, Film Brain, and the entire Agony Booth crew!”Busty Cops (2004)
It's the tale of three cops who are busty, and also undercover, which we know because they constantly tell everyone they meet that they are undercover.Rocky, the Broadway musical
“During Rocky’s training sequence, big rubber sides of beef descend from the rafters, which may be the first time I’ve witnessed a scene transition get its own round of applause.”The Specialist (1994)
“For some reason, this film was marketed as a more ‘serious’ movie, even though I’m pretty certain anybody who’s a fan of either Sylvester Stallone or Sharon Stone doesn’t go to the movies for serious dramatics. Stallone’s fans go to see him kill a lot of things and be macho, and Stone’s fans go in the vain hope she’ll do another leg spreading scene like in Basic Instinct. To be fair, she does get naked in this film. On the downside, so does Sly.”
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