Based on the video game of the same name, it's a film with a risky concept: Gather four hot women (Holly Valance, Devon Aoki, Sarah Carter, Jaime Pressly), put them in as little clothes as possible, and have them fight each other! Luckily for Cecil, the concept works, making for one of the best video game adaptations ever.

“Once I made up a drinking game based around this movie. One of the rules was that you took a drink every time Cloud looked moody. Alcohol poisoning usually set in around the thirty-minute mark.”

Loosely based on the arcade game of the same name, Double Dragon stars Party of Five's Scott Wolf and future Iron Chef host Mark Dacascos as two interracial brothers living in post-apocalyptic Los Angeles in the far-flung year of 2007. With the help of Alyssa Milano, they protect one-half of an ancient Chinese talisman from falling into the hands of crime lord Robert Patrick, who will stop at nothing to reassemble the medallion and gain absolute power.

German wunderkind Dr. Uwe Boll triumphs again with his latest masterpiece, Postal. Funnier than Schindler's List, and yet more soul-searching than Epic Movie, the box-office phenomenon that was Postal has undoubtedly changed the course of cinema. Thank you, Dr. Boll!

"Uwe Boll breaks rules of drama so obvious that you never knew they existed until you see them not being followed."

"Let it just be known that this film is stupid. And we're talking slam-your-head-down-on-the-table-dumb here."

It's a lesson I've learned time and time again: People will slam movies purely because of who's in them. When forgettable films like Crossroads or Glitter or From Justin to Kelly make it onto the IMDb's list of the 100 worst films of all time, you know people are voting based on the magazine covers at the checkout stand. Same with the films nominated for the Razzie this year. If not for the presence of Sharon Stone, the Wayans brothers, Nicolas Cage, M. Night Shyamalan, and (to a much lesser extent) Uwe Boll, would anybody give two shits about any of these movies? Probably not.