Stephen Colbert Warns Of Lesbian Throuple Threat To Traditional Marriage (Video)

From Massachusetts, Stephen Colbert brings ominous news of the latest rather hot threat to the institution of marriage: three women who call themselves a “throuple” and have sparked another rightwing freakout about how legalizing same-sex marriage will ultimately kill traditional marriage dead. Or as Colbert notes, at the very least, it will ruin “traditional threesomes, which are a wedge that drives straight couples apart after what was supposed to be a fun birthday present inevitably leads to crying whenever someone hears the name Stacey.”

Of course, there’s also the boring details: the trio — Doll, Kitten, and Brynn Young (we swear we are not making that up) — aren’t actually in a legally recognized union, and there’s nobody introducing or arguing for legislation to make polyamorous unions a legal thing. The boring fact-based folks at Media Matters drily note that not a single one of the countries that have legalized gay marriage has even hinted at recognizing polygamous marriages.

Happily, Colbert focuses on what really matters: observing that, despite appearances, Fox News’s Todd Starnes is definitely not a lesbian at all, and that Antonin Scalia has been thinking about lesbian threesomes since at least Lawrence v. Texas.

TV Show: The Colbert Report

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  • Bill Slider

    Is this like an all you can eat buffet?

    • le_renard_de_velours

      All you can eat? Or all you want to eat?

      • thepoliticalcat

        Sprained tongues are not a useful cop-out. At least not if the gals have whips.

        • zerosumgame0005

          the trick (no pun not intended ;p) is stretching it before getting down to work!

  • beavertank

    While Scalia may have been thinking of lesbian threesomes since Lawrence, I have a feeling Clarence Thomas has been thinking of them for far, far longer.

    • thepoliticalcat

      Not so long. Oh, the thinking part? OK, maybe.