Who’s Scarier — Moloch and the Headless Horseman Or A Creepy Gardener Who Talks To A Pier 1 Imports Storage Box?
The episode opens with Pandora speaking gently to her pet tree and then summoning a knife from her Pier One Box of evil for, what else, the monster-of-the-week storyline! As she gazes creepily at her various props, she murmurs what sounds like lines from a nursery tale about her fear fetish, which apparently includes uncovering “the fears of the witnesses.”
Sleepy Hollow has not become a Law and Order-type procedural, as I initially feared. Pandora has been declared by the witnesses to be their second tribulation the witnesses will face. (Moloch and the apocalypse being the first). So, yes, we do have a season-long storyline involving a big bad, but the evil plaguing the witnesses this season feels muted and remote.
By the end of Sleepy Hollow’s pilot episode, we’d learned that Moloch was attempting to usher in the apocalypse and Ichabod and Abbie were destined to face seven YEARS of tribulations (they changed the mythology this season) to prevent the rise of the 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
By contrast, three episodes into the season all we know is that Pandora is vaguely evil, kinda targeting the witnesses with doodads from her box, and that she’s a fear collector, scooping up the fears of mortals and dumping them in her fear water to used to cultivate her spooky garden. There’s no real sense of urgency, fear or excitement, yet.
Citizen Crane and Caroline 2.0
We never get tired of Cranky Crane shaking his verbal fist at newfangled, 21st Century this, that, and the other. Tom Mison is just that good. The context for his early episode rantings this week again involves Ichabod’s efforts to save the Sleepy Hollow Archives from being turned into a drug store. This week, he ends his rant by announcing his commitment to
AbbieAmerica; Ichabod says he wants to become an American citizen.
File this under, women are a trip. Not two seconds after Ichabod makes his proclamation and Abbie leaves to go to work, Caroline 2.0 reveals she
is stalking him overheard him mention the citizenship thing.
I’ll back up, only folks deep in the Sleepy Head fandom automatically will get the reference to Caroline. Caroline was the the Revolutionary War re-enactor who had “Crane on the Brain.” Her Crane love made her the target of one of the best monsters-of-the-week of all time, the Weeping Lady?
Caroline has been reincarnated as Zoe Corinth (Maya Kazan). (Not literally, reincarnated, as far as we know).
Like Caroline the 1st, Caroline 2.0 is truly stalking him; she also shows up at the Archives to tell him she was not playing about wanting to help him; her brother-in-law is a member of the Senate Select Committee on Immigration and he’s corrupt enough to help some random dude at the behest of his overly thirsty sister-in-law. You know the saying – first, comes a hot foreigner, then comes a green card marriage of convenience . . . Maybe that’s not exactly how that saying goes. Unless Caroline 2 ends up being an evil spy for Pandora, the entire point of Caroline 2.0 seems to be as a vehicle for writers to express THEIR obvious crush on their leading man. We get it Sleepy Hollow writers, you’re incredibly attracted to Ichabod Crane/Tom Mison. The constant Crane love is over-the-top. Tom, you’re going to need a restraining order when the show ends.
Monster Mash-up: Succubus + The Judas Coin
If the monster-of-the-week plot this week felt familiar, it’s because it was a mash-up of monsters we’ve seen before. We mined the emotional terrors that can boil over from unrequited desire when we met the Succubus last season. We’ve also had an episode where a simple object brings out a person’s inner demons in the Judas Coin episode.
This week, Pandora targets Nelson, a stereotypical mass murderer (young, white nerdy male loner) in a bar. Nerdy Nelson has an unrequited crush on a Barbie, who’s ignoring him in favor of Biff. Sounds like the Succubus episode, am I right? Pandora dances with Nerdy Nelson, urges him not to give up, and, it’s possible she slept with him, but that part’s not clear, he wakes up fully-clothed, so probably not. All he (and we, the audience) know is that when he wakes up the next morning he finds the dagger from Pandora’s box in his bedroom. The knife inspires him to don dark glasses and stab Biff in an elevator.
Dashing Daniel Reynolds, Abbie’s new boss, assigns Abbie to the case. She shows up to the scene of the crime with Crane, who (surprise, surprise) thinks the whole thing looks very familiar to something that happened to him.