Richard Nixon Didn’t Think Girls Should Cuss Like Common Jews, Rachel Maddow Is On It (Video)

Richard Nixon Didn't Think Girls Should Cuss Like Common Jews, Rachel Maddow Is On It (Video)
It is no secret that we are totally gay for Rachel Maddow, who thinks that Yr. Wonkette is “profane and wonderful.” And Thursday she was in Full Nerdgirl mode, geeking out over newly-discovered audiotapes from Richard Nixon’s infamous Oval Office recording trove. But in these 1971 recordings, Nixon’s not plotting to cover up Watergate or fulminating about his enemies. Instead, these tapes captured the President having a philosophical chat with Henry Kissinger and H.R. Haldeman about “the gay thing” Nixon insists he’s very tolerant, understands that “They’re born that way,” and then goes on to explain,

By God, I am not going to have a situation where we pass along a law indicating, “Well, now, kids, just go out and be gay.” They can do it. Just leave them alone. That’s a lifestyle I don’t want to touch…

And then we get to the even crazier, more purely Nixonesque moment: Richard Nixon wondering out loud why it is that “girls don’t swear,” and being slightly astonished when Haldeman bursts his bubble, telling him that girls do in fact swear. Or at least they do nowadays. Almost any politician could have said that two-faced stuff about tolerating the gay but not wanting to encourage it, but only Richard Milhous Nixon would be taken aback to learn that women actually cuss. But he’s still pretty sure the smart ones don’t.

And because it’s always (burp!) hilarious, we’re including Maddow’s teaser clip of Lyndon Johnson ordering pants, which we’ll agree remains the greatest presidential audiotape of all time. The Nixon stuff is funny because it’s new, but we doubt any president will ever say anything on mic that could rival LBJ complaining about pants cuttin’ his nuts like sittin’ on barbed wire.

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  • beavertank

    I’m totally gay for Rachel Maddow, and I’m a man. She’s that fantastic.

    • bluecrane1

      LOL – me too. Thinking I might like the opportunity to “cure” her. (hopefully she’s smiling if seeing this)

  • goonemeritus

    When a heckler accused Rosanne Barr of being unladylike shetold him to suck her dick.

  • nightmoth

    I’m going to show my age here—Nixon, on “the Gays”, was tolerant for 1971. My gay male piano teacher was shot to death in south Georgia in 1973 for being gay. So “they’re born that way” and “leave them alone” was pretty decent on Nixon’s part. Also “nice” girls were trained from early ladyhood NOT to cuss. At my first anti-war demonstration, in 1969, the chant went “1–2–3–4–We don’t want your fucking war!!” and I wouldn’t say the bad word. (I tried to substitute “dadgum” but got some serious side-eye.) I was a quick study, though, and was soon repeating that cliche: “War is the real obscenity.” But now that I’m a whole lot older, I wish we hadn’t used “shock words” so much because I’m tired of hearing them in casual discourse.

  • guppy06

    They can do it. Just leave them alone.

    If only today’s GOP were as flaming liberal as Nixon.

  • MichaelG

    You’d think a sixty-something man, after all those years of buying and having pants made, would have figured out the phrase, “I need a longer rise.” (((((Burp))))

    • Charismatic_dairy_goats

      But it was *way* more fun to say “bunghole.”

    • nzmccorm

      It was on purpose. LBJ deliberately played up how coarse and gross and cruel he was in order to intimidate people. Hence whipping out his dick in elevators.

  • bluecrane1

    Look back at Nixon and he did some pretty good stuff for this country. Come to think of it, he did more to promote liberal causes than anybody since. Think about it. AND while you’re thinking about it, what specifically was it that Nixon did to deserve impeachment?

    • bluecrane1

      Here’s a clue from one that watched the whole thing. He tried to hush up an embarrassment at a time when the Democrats were at least as vicious as Boehner and Mitchell are today. Dirty politicians in either party are simply dirty politicians.

      • Boscoe

        Seriously? You call orchestrating burglary and then using presidential power to try and cover it up “an embarrassment”? Sorry, but the crazy mental yoga you’re employing to reach your “both sides do it” false equivalency just ain’t cutting it, man. Try harder.

        • Zippy W Pinhead

          No kidding! and the Watergate break-in was just the tip of the iceberg. Nixon was bugging all his political opponents and he used the FBI, CIA and IRS to target and attack his perceived enemies. He turned Hunt and Liddy loose on anyone he wanted ruined (ask Daniel Ellsberg if it was ‘just an embarrassment’) These clowns actually plotted to kill journalist Jack Anderson. Once the shit hit the fan, Nixon went after special prosecutor Archibald Cox and the Atty General in the ‘Saturday Night Massacre’ and fired them all via that weasel Bork. And he also arguably committed treason by intentionally derailing the Paris Peace Accords in order to boost his electoral chances. Nixon was a paranoid raving loon who didn’t hesitate to break the law and ratfuck people in order to ruin them. Policy-wise, it is ironic that he’d be considered a liberal by today’s rabid GOP, but that certainly doesn’t make him any sort of good guy.

          • guppy06

            Nixon was bugging all his political opponents

            In contrast, Obama just bugs everyone.

          • Zippy W Pinhead

            Yeah, but Tricky Dick was bugging people before it was cool

    • nzmccorm

      A lot of that came from the fact that, thanks to Kennedy (and especially LBJ), he was facing a very tenacious, very angry, and very liberal Congress.

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    I need T-P for my bunghole!