Morning Sideboob: Michael Jackson’s Real-Life ‘Billie Jean’

Morning Sideboob: Michael Jackson's Real-Life 'Billie Jean'

Michael Jackson May Have an Illegitimate Son

Move over Prince, Paris, and Blanket. You may have a brother. Brandon Howard, who goes by B Howard and is the son of gospel singer Miki Howard, is believed to have been produced from the King of Pop’s loin.

B Howard is claiming to have nothing to do with leaking this story to the public, even though he submitted his DNA for testing.

He looks and acts just like MJ, but so does this guy.

Even though B Howard isn’t pursuing the truth, Alki David and his company, FilmOn.com, are. Alki purchased Michael’s 30-year-old dental impression from a Beverly Hills doctor. Nasty! They took the DNA from the dental impression and B Howard’s DNA sample and…Maury?

Is that Corey Feldman at the table? What the hell is going on? Sez TMZ:

There’s a 99.9% chance a 31-year-old man is Michael Jackson’s illegitimate son … at least that’s the claim after an alleged DNA test turned up a match.

The thought of Michael Jackson procreating…rancid dental impressions…we need a drink.

Andrew Garfield: Hero or Villain?

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Yesterday, reports surfaced that current Spider-Man Andrew Garfield was scheduled to appear on the Oscars with Batkid, the 5-year-old cancer survivor who got to live out his dream of being Batman on the streets of San Francisco last year.

The story was, Andrew showed up to rehearsals, butted heads with the producers over his lines, and then bailed on the whole thing when he didn’t get his way, devastating Batkid.

Boooooooo!!! We hate Andrew Garfield!

But wait. Now we’re hearing his side of the story, and he says the segment was cut by the producers because it didn’t fit the tone of the show. And as a consolation prize, Andrew took Batkid to Disneyland the next day.

Who are we to believe? An entitled Hollywood actor or dream-crushing Hollywood powers that be?

Aaron Carter Wants to Win Back Hilary Duff

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Guys! If you find a good woman, treat her right. If you don’t and she leaves your ass, crying in public about how much you want her back isn’t a good look.

You’ve got Robin Thicke dedicating songs to his wife who seems to have moved on.

You’ve got Justin Bieber dropping hints on Instagram about his love for Selena Gomez.

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And now we come to Aaron Carter, former teen heartthrob, Backstreet Boys brother, and Hilary Duff ex. Well, after hearing that Hilary split with her husband, Aaron wants to woo her back into his arms. He misses the deep and meaningful relationship they had at 14 years old.

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And why did Aaron dump Hilary way back when? To get with Lindsay Lohan, duh.

Last time we saw Aaron, he was the first cheftestant eliminated on the cooking show “Rachael vs. Guy” for trying to make ranch dressing out of sour cream, thousand island, and Tabasco sauce. Quite a catch.

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  • $73376667

    I’d humiliate myself on Twitter (more than usual) too if I thought it’d get me anywhere with Selena Gomez.

  • msanthropesmr

    TIL – Either loin or loins is acceptable!

    • Annie Towne

      Maybe, but if you use “loin”, you have to tell us which one.