"Let’s Get Social" Is Your New Ear-Bleeding Earworm Corporate Anthem
Listen. If you have to go to a Workplace FunTime Jamboree, do not have songs. If you have to have songs, do not record the songs. If you ignore this valuable life advice, you end up starring in this video, which we had to watch through squeezed-shut eyes because we felt SO BAD for these people. What are the worst parts of “Let’s Get Social,” the Social Media Marketing World Anthem? Haha trick question it is all of them. Every last part. Here are some of the worst of the worst.
1) When the David Cross Dockers- wearing dude introduces this as a very special treat. Those words make no sense together as related to this, sir.
2) The attempt to turn the whole thing into a gospel call-and-response singalong.
3) The lyrics. All of the lyrics. But particularly this part:
If you love me for my clouds? (We think it is “clouds.” It could be “crowds” maybe? Who can say!)
I promise I’ll share yours.
4) The part where the David Cross Doofus Dockers guy puts on sunglasses and starts rapping.
Hmmm. Actually there he looks more like Jesse Ventura. It’s probably the hat.
5) The part where they make the audience get up and take selfies with their neighbors.
6) The fact that this thing is FIVE MINUTES LONG. That is a remarkably long time to humiliate yourself in front of a crowd voluntarily and, it appears, entirely sober. Do these people make much more monies than we do and therefore just DGAF how stupid they look? Did someone kidnap their children and hold them hostage until they agreed to do this? We have so many questions, but most of them boil down to WHY GOD WHY? There is just no reason to ever do this to yourself. Much like naked pictures taken by your ex, there’s no way it doesn’t end up on the Internet so think twice, thrice, all the times before you do this and then DON’T DO IT.