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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Member, Moderator, Recapper
Joined: 5/17/2008
Posts: 2,908
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Post your comments here about this Agonizer article: Article: Steven Seagal's Lightning Bolt! Click here to read the article!( Note: The Agony Booth forums were upgraded in May of 2008. The original comments thread can be found in the Agony Booth Forum Archive. This signature was removed because it contained an image and/or design that infringes on the intellectual property rights of Warner Bros. Entertainment Inc. More specifically, Snakes on A Plane.
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Elements of Corrosion: Oppressor: Music (agony booth forum) Lightning Bolt Movies & TV (lightning bolt)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008 Posts: 42
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This is still, after being here for over a year, my absolutle favorite article on the site. The part where Al compares the drink with liquid cigarettes was just great. This has been a Scotteration, Incorperated Production. Scott's youtube accounts: www.youtube.com/scottfrostbenderwww.youtube.com/scotterationinc
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Ashes to Ashes: America's Hundred-Year Cigarette War ... (cigarettes) Ashes to Ashes: America's Hundred-Year Cigarette War ... (cigarettes)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008 Posts: 893 Location: Denmark
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I remember the first time I read this, I thought it was the funniest thing that had ever been written.  There are heroes in the seaweed
There are children in the morning
They are leaning out for love
And they will lean that way forever
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The Funny Things Kids Say - Vol. 3 (Funny Things Kids ... (funniest thing) The Funny Thing Is...: Ellen DeGeneres: Books (funniest thing)
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008
Posts: 304
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It's tied with the "Lee L. Mercer For President" article as being my favourite Agonizer piece ever. (Even worse was that I did get the chance to try this foul concoction at one point. Goddamn, that was truely wasted money.)
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The Complete Johnny Mercer Songbook: Various Artists ... (mercer) The Complete Johnny Mercer Songbook: Various Artists ... (mercer)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008 Posts: 295
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That was quite possibly the funniest thing I've ever read.  "I don't read the script, the script reads me."
"What does that even mean?"
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Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the White House, A ... (funniest thing) The Funny Things Kids Say - Vol. 3 (Funny Things Kids ... (funniest thing)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008 Posts: 7
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Funniest article ever. Hands down. "You have no idea...how powerful madness can be." - Evil Wizard Ray Liotta - In The Name Of The King: A Dungeon Siege Tale
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Songs from the Crystal Cave: Steven Seagal: Music (steven seagal) Cherry Charge Energy Drink, 24, 16 Ounce Cans: Health ... (lightning bolt)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/25/2008 Posts: 74
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Songs from the Crystal Cave: Steven Seagal: Music (steven segal) Lightning Bolt: Lightning Bolt: Music (lightningbolt)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 6/9/2008 Posts: 680
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Tears of laughter are streaming down my face. I drink Red Bull. I've stopped drinking regular cola, soda or pop. Red Bull is the only energy drink I consume. It's the most tolerable. And after reading this "Agonizer review", I've been searching for Mr Segal's drink where ever I stop. I have not been successful. However, if I do find it, I don't think I will purchase it. As the fruit/ashtray taste just isn't my cup of tea. Again, priceless. "And with her, die the dark ages for this planet..."
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Tales of Tears and Laughter: Short Fiction of Medieval ... (tears of laughter) Celsius Energy Drink, Wildberry, 12-Ounce Cans (Pack ... (energy drink)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008 Posts: 29
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Tyrant wrote:It's tied with the "Lee L. Mercer For President" article as being my favourite Agonizer piece ever. (Even worse was that I did get the chance to try this foul concoction at one point. Goddamn, that was truely wasted money.) My brother wanted to try this at one time, being a big fan of The Seagal. He never did find any of it. "The noise that my grandparents make when they are having sex is better than this album...oh, my grandparents are dead." - Amazon.com review of K-Fed's album
"I am Brother Grignr, of the Cult of the Seventh-Day Goat-Fondlers. Would you like some pamphlets?" - Grignr
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Flight of Fury: steven seagal: Movies & TV (seagal) The Brothers K: David James Duncan: Books (brother)
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 6/9/2008 Posts: 680
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Speaking of Segal. I recently saw parts of "Out For a Kill" on cable the other day. One his straight-to-video/cable movies. Yecch! And barely did I see the man himself. I would watched all of it, but the kiddies were demanding my attention... "And with her, die the dark ages for this planet..."
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Audio/Video Cable Installer's Pocket Guide (McGraw ... (video cable) Official Wii Component Video Cable: Video Games (video cable)
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008
Posts: 304
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Emerald Eclipse wrote:
My brother wanted to try this at one time, being a big fan of The Seagal. He never did find any of it.
He should be lucky then, unless he worships Seagal. I wouldn't say that it's the worst drink of all time (that goes to a foul concoction of Sunny D, Pepsi, and lemonade. Long story), but it's definately as bad as the Agonizer article describes. The only people I could see actually enjoying a drink like this are masochists and people on a ton of meth.
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The Accounting Game, 2E: Basic Accounting Fresh from ... (lemonade) The Brothers K: David James Duncan: Books (brother)
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Member, Moderator, Recapper
Joined: 5/17/2008
Posts: 2,908
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The official site has a list of places where you can buy it, including through Seagal's online store. Only $12 for a 6 pack! And you can even throw in a Pashmina shawl for just $60 more! This signature was removed because it contained an image and/or design that infringes on the intellectual property rights of Warner Bros. Entertainment Inc. More specifically, Snakes on A Plane.
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Cashmere Pashmina Shawl / Wrap with Basket Weave (78 ... (pashmina shawl) Kindle: Amazon's New Wireless Reading Device: Kindle Store (s online store)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008 Posts: 1,150
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Come now Al. That site hasn't been updated in over two years! You might as well donate money to Lee L. Mercer instead."I've just found out that I have saboteurs in the tower! I still do not have the meteorite piece! I'm about to lose everything! We can talk about this later, if later even occurs!"
The music changed and the announcer spoke of the next tunes with a few witty acknowledgments in between.
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The Soul of Money: Transforming Your Relationship with ... (money) The Soul of Money: Transforming Your Relationship with ... (money)
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 6/9/2008 Posts: 680
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Albert wrote:The official site has a list of places where you can buy it, including through Seagal's online store. Only $12 for a 6 pack! And you can even throw in a Pashmina shawl for just $60 more! Done!  "And with her, die the dark ages for this planet..."
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Present Tense/Tongue Twister: Shoes: Music (tongue) Pashmina Shawl Wrap78X28 42 Vibrant Colors Apparel (pashmina shawl)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008 Posts: 8
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My local Wal-Mart has both flavors in the cooler of the store deli. And yes, I have tried both and they are just as frightening as Albert says they are (Although I must admit that I preferred the Asian Experience to the Cherry Charge).
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East Asian Experience in Environmental Governance ... (asian experience) YummyEarth Organic Lollipops, Assorted Flavors, 150 ... (flavors)
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 6/9/2008 Posts: 680
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Anybody dare to try this brand...?  "And with her, die the dark ages for this planet..."
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SR60: Electronics (cans) Sex Talk: Carole Altman: Books (sex talk)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008 Posts: 45
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Drosophila Cytogenetics Protocols (Methods in ... (testes) The 99 Cent Only Stores Cookbook: Gourmet Recipes at ... (99 cent stores)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008 Posts: 1,217 Location: In the soonsheeyine
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Something about the site comes across as phony to me. There are no links, for example; just text. Hmm... Then again, I've never heard of ExtenZe at all before tonight, so make of that what you will. Anybody who don't like that, daddy, don't like chicken on Sundays.
Anyway he's married and with a kid now and doesn't like to talk about how he'd fallen in love with a basic pixilated mouthless Japanese cartoon. --Nick
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ExtenZe-Natural Male Enhancement Extra Strength ... (extenze) Jesse James Dear Jesus Jesse James Music (dear jesus)
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 Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 5/17/2008 Posts: 781
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Speaking of horrible energy drinks, has anyone had Brawndo?
"There are black zones of shadow close to our daily paths, and now and then some evil soul breaks a passage through. When that happens, the man who knows must strike before reckoning the consequences."
"I see. So you're rather violent?"
"Sometimes."
-Joyce, interviewing Eazy-E, "No More ?'s"
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Monster Energy Drink, 16 Ounce Cans- (Pack of 12): Grocery (energy drinks)
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Member
Joined: 6/9/2008 Posts: 680
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Sillstaw wrote:
Something about the site comes across as phony to me. There are no links, for example; just text. Hmm...
Then again, I've never heard of ExtenZe at all before tonight, so make of that what you will.
I air a 60 second commercial for it exactly at 10:29pm central time every weeknight. And boy is it good... "And with her, die the dark ages for this planet..."
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ExtenZe-Natural Male Enhancement Extra Strength ... (extenze) Astro-weather 2006 - Central Time Zone: Guy Spiro: Books (central time)
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