Help Us Drill Gun Baby Drill All Holiday Season Long
You know how sometimes you’re puttering around the house, doing those little repairs, making sure the screws haven’t come loose from the coffee table again, drilling a hole to hang a picture in the bedroom? Aren’t those the times when you really think FUCK YEAH I WISH I HAD A GUN TO DO THIS? Us too! Which is why we’re asking for this
penis substitute drill gun power screwdriver.
The Drill Gun Power Screwdriver is an amazing power tool which is shaped like a revolver! That’s right Al Capone, time for you to get some house work done mafia style! It works just like a regular electric screwdriver, only now it’s backed by the power of a gun! Just put the size screw that you need in the barrel of the gun, aim, and shoot! The remaining drill bits can rest in the chambers until you need them!
[…] The feel of this amazing power tool will make even the scrawniest of men feel like Schwarzenegger! The Drill Gun Power Screwdriver makes the perfect gift for guys or girls who like packing heat! So why don’t you man up, buy the Drill Gun and unleash hell! Or at least fix the kitchen cabinet already.
See? We need this. Otherwise we’ll feel all wussy and emasculated and ladylike when we try to install a light switch, and no one wants that.
[We shuffle the mean cold streets, eternally sad that you have not bought us things from our Christmas list.]