Category: TV

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Are You Afraid of the Dark? “The Tale of the Final Wish” (part 2 of 2)

“I effing loved this one when I was a kid, mostly because it had a certain Mr. Bobcat Goldthwait as the villain. As a wee girl, I was kind of obsessed with the Police Academy movies, so much so that I used to host little mini-marathons. Unsurprisingly, I was usually the only one in attendance, save for my favorite stuffed animals. Later, Cheer Bear and the rest of the Care Bears would begin to make excuses not to attend my Policy Academy parties, so, you know…”

Are You Afraid of the Dark? “The Tale of the Final Wish” (part 1 of 2)

“I effing loved this one when I was a kid, mostly because it had a certain Mr. Bobcat Goldthwait as the villain. As a wee girl, I was kind of obsessed with the Police Academy movies, so much so that I used to host little mini-marathons. Unsurprisingly, I was usually the only one in attendance, save for my favorite stuffed animals. Later, Cheer Bear and the rest of the Care Bears would begin to make excuses not to attend my Policy Academy parties, so, you know…”

Star Trek: The Next Generation “The Last Outpost” (part 3 of 3)

“It was 1987, and the fourth episode of the first season of Star Trek: The Next Generation, when nobody knew what a Ferengi was or anything of their now-famous tendencies. So join me, won’t you, as we take a trip back to when an aura of mystery surrounded this new rival of the Federation, and see just how long it takes for their mystique to be utterly and forever left in ruins. ”

Star Trek: The Next Generation “The Last Outpost” (part 2 of 3)

“It was 1987, and the fourth episode of the first season of Star Trek: The Next Generation, when nobody knew what a Ferengi was or anything of their now-famous tendencies. So join me, won’t you, as we take a trip back to when an aura of mystery surrounded this new rival of the Federation, and see just how long it takes for their mystique to be utterly and forever left in ruins. ”

Star Trek: The Next Generation “The Last Outpost” (part 1 of 3)

“It was 1987, and the fourth episode of the first season of Star Trek: The Next Generation, when nobody knew what a Ferengi was or anything of their now-famous tendencies. So join me, won’t you, as we take a trip back to when an aura of mystery surrounded this new rival of the Federation, and see just how long it takes for their mystique to be utterly and forever left in ruins. ”

Avatar: The Last Airbender “The Painted Lady” (part 2 of 2)

“This final episode of The Worst of Avatar is ‘The Painted Lady’, the season’s third episode. Luckily, much like ‘Avatar Day’, the season got this embarrassment out of the way early, with the episodes that followed all being decent to spectacular. And right now, it’s the last episode in my way before I take on M. Night Shyamalan’s hideous mangling of the series, so here goes.”

Avatar: The Last Airbender “The Painted Lady” (part 1 of 2)

“This final episode of The Worst of Avatar is ‘The Painted Lady’, the season’s third episode. Luckily, much like ‘Avatar Day’, the season got this embarrassment out of the way early, with the episodes that followed all being decent to spectacular. And right now, it’s the last episode in my way before I take on M. Night Shyamalan’s hideous mangling of the series, so here goes.”

Family Ties “A, My Name is Alex” (part 5 of 5)

“I don’t think anyone under the age of 25 can fully appreciate how much hype and anticipation there was surrounding this episode when it originally aired. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to break genre boundaries. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to smash the fourth wall. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to give us all totally new insights into the nature of existence itself. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ would be all that, and oh yes, it would also be the bag of chips.”

Family Ties “A, My Name is Alex” (part 4 of 5)

“I don’t think anyone under the age of 25 can fully appreciate how much hype and anticipation there was surrounding this episode when it originally aired. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to break genre boundaries. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to smash the fourth wall. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to give us all totally new insights into the nature of existence itself. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ would be all that, and oh yes, it would also be the bag of chips.”

Family Ties “A, My Name is Alex” (part 3 of 5)

“I don’t think anyone under the age of 25 can fully appreciate how much hype and anticipation there was surrounding this episode when it originally aired. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to break genre boundaries. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to smash the fourth wall. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to give us all totally new insights into the nature of existence itself. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ would be all that, and oh yes, it would also be the bag of chips.”

Family Ties “A, My Name is Alex” (part 2 of 5)

“I don’t think anyone under the age of 25 can fully appreciate how much hype and anticipation there was surrounding this episode when it originally aired. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to break genre boundaries. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to smash the fourth wall. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to give us all totally new insights into the nature of existence itself. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ would be all that, and oh yes, it would also be the bag of chips.”

Family Ties “A, My Name is Alex” (part 1 of 5)

“I don’t think anyone under the age of 25 can fully appreciate how much hype and anticipation there was surrounding this episode when it originally aired. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to break genre boundaries. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to smash the fourth wall. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ was going to give us all totally new insights into the nature of existence itself. ‘A, My Name is Alex’ would be all that, and oh yes, it would also be the bag of chips.”

Avatar: The Last Airbender “Avatar Day” (part 3 of 3)

“In a half hour episode, minus the commercials, the opening and closing credits, and the Zuko and Iroh subplot, there isn’t nearly enough time to develop a good mystery plot, with the heroes finding clues and gradually realizing the truth. Instead, we have a few cursory investigation scenes, and a bunch of lame jokes, before everything’s solved with a double dose of deus ex machina.”

Avatar: The Last Airbender “Avatar Day” (part 2 of 3)

“In a half hour episode, minus the commercials, the opening and closing credits, and the Zuko and Iroh subplot, there isn’t nearly enough time to develop a good mystery plot, with the heroes finding clues and gradually realizing the truth. Instead, we have a few cursory investigation scenes, and a bunch of lame jokes, before everything’s solved with a double dose of deus ex machina.”

Avatar: The Last Airbender “Avatar Day” (part 1 of 3)

“In a half hour episode, minus the commercials, the opening and closing credits, and the Zuko and Iroh subplot, there isn’t nearly enough time to develop a good mystery plot, with the heroes finding clues and gradually realizing the truth. Instead, we have a few cursory investigation scenes, and a bunch of lame jokes, before everything’s solved with a double dose of deus ex machina.”

Avatar: The Last Airbender “The Great Divide” (part 3 of 3)

“This episode talks down to the audience at every opportunity, throws in all kinds of gratuitous gags, and only exists to shove a moral down our throats. Even by the time it aired, the show’s audience had learned to expect more than that, and I shudder to think that there were probably more than a few people who had been telling their friends about this great show called Avatar: The Last Airbender that was so much better than any other American cartoon, only to have this be the next episode that aired.”

Avatar: The Last Airbender “The Great Divide” (part 2 of 3)

“This episode talks down to the audience at every opportunity, throws in all kinds of gratuitous gags, and only exists to shove a moral down our throats. Even by the time it aired, the show’s audience had learned to expect more than that, and I shudder to think that there were probably more than a few people who had been telling their friends about this great show called Avatar: The Last Airbender that was so much better than any other American cartoon, only to have this be the next episode that aired.”

Avatar: The Last Airbender “The Great Divide” (part 1 of 3)

“This episode talks down to the audience at every opportunity, throws in all kinds of gratuitous gags, and only exists to shove a moral down our throats. Even by the time it aired, the show’s audience had learned to expect more than that, and I shudder to think that there were probably more than a few people who had been telling their friends about this great show called Avatar: The Last Airbender that was so much better than any other American cartoon, only to have this be the next episode that aired.”

Degrassi Junior High “Eggbert” (part 5 of 5)

“And I know what you parents out there must be thinking: taking care of an egg is a total cakewalk compared to an actual baby, right? How could watching an egg possibly teach you what it’s like to be a parent? But you have to keep in mind that Spike is a Degrassi kid. And taking care of inanimate objects is way beyond most Degrassi kids. I hear when Spike was a little girl, her pet rock died.”