HTNP Awards For the 2015 Miss Universe Pageant

The 63rd annual Miss Universe pageant aired Sunday, December 20th on Fox and everyone’s still talking about the huge gaffe Steve Harvey made when he accidentally announced the wrong winner. For those of you who had better stuff to do on a Sunday night than watch impossibly skinny and gorgeous women strut around a stage and let them destroy your self-esteem, here’s the lowdown: Steve Harvey accidentally announced Miss Colombia contestant Ariadna Gutierrez as the winner instead of Miss Philippines, Pia Alonzo Wurzbach. And not like, “The winner is Miss Colombia–oh wait, sorry it’s Miss Phillipines. My bad y’all!” They crowned Gutierrez and she was doing her victory lap and everything before Steve Harvey sheepishly admitted his mistake.

3

Awkward.

The pageant is over but people are still talking about the error, which is a shame because the other contestants and their efforts have been largely forgotten. While we don’t have any fancy tiaras or prize money, we at Happy Nice Time People would like to present our own awards to the Miss Universe contestants.

 

Miss Strongest Back

  5

Miss Ghana

She’s in a bikini, wearing platform heels and is somehow still managing to stand upright. Where’s her crown?

Most Unnecessary Use of Feathers

8

I think she might need just a few more feathers. Guys, what do you think?

Most Random National Costume

4

Miss Australia

Are those opera glasses? Because of the Sydney Opera house? I just…I don’t really don’t get it.

Most Disturbingly Sexualization of a Swan

5

Miss Denmark

I’m sorry but slapping a swan headpiece/wings still does not justify the extreme winged eyeliner, lace crop top, tulle skirt attached to white panties, and cheap looking thigh high leather boots.

Most Random National Costume

3

Miss Curacao

I take it back, Australia. This is definitely the most random.

Most Boring Costume

4

Miss Serbia. 

Girl, we are in the midst of an explosion of glitter, sequins, and feathers. If you look bored, how do you think we feel?

Most Patriotic

4

Miss USA.

Duh. USA! USA! USA!

Who were your top picks for Miss Universe?

 

Susan Velazquez

Susan is a recent college grad and writer who enjoys all things from the 1980s, snarking on dumb television, and reveling in celebrity gossip. Oh, and she has serious interests like reading historical fiction, getting involved in social issues, and consuming French fries.

You may also like...

  • Ms. Australia may have been making a Dame Edna reference.