Author: Julie Kushner

Game of Thrones: Weddings Are the Worst

This week on Game of Thrones, the series’ war on weddings with poor Sansa Stark the latest victim. Also, Arya gets a promotion, Margaery gets a demotion, Bronn and Jamie play dress-up, and Tyrion and Jorah make some new friends with benefits, but, perhaps, not the kind of benefits they were hoping for.

Game of Thrones: Battle Scars

This week on Game of Thrones, Dany feeds her dragon kids a gourmet lunch. Greyworm lives to be ball-less another day. Jon Snow grows a pair. Sansa comes to terms with just how badly her life sucks. Tyrion grudgingly acknowledges the perks of being held hostage.

Once Upon a Time: Lord of the Assholes

This week on Once Upon a Time’s dramatic two-part season finale, the Author proved himself to be the crappiest alt-world fanfiction writer ever. Snow White got a new, even worse haircut. (Yes, it is possible!) A few people died, then un-died. A long-awaited “I love you” was exchanged. Old Dirty Homeless-Looking Mickey remained Old Dirty and Homeless-Looking, then died and stayed dead. And Storybrooke got both a new Author and a brand new Lord Assholes.

Once Upon a Time: Mother EFFER!

Just in time for Mother’s Day, Once has gone and delivered us an hour filled with mother/daughter reunions, mother/daughter reconciliations, mother/daughter bonding sessions, and a fire-breathing dragon who burns people’s faces off . . . You know, the usual . . .

Game of Thrones: Decapitated by Kindness

This week’s Game of Thrones features Arya doing a little housekeeping, Sansa getting engaged again, Tommen getting a whole lot of nookie, Jon Snow getting a little head, Margaery beating Cersei in a verbal smackdown, and a High Septon being quite literally beaten by his religion.