"Nude on the Moon is an excellent title for this flick—it describes the movie to a 'T'. Having said that, it's surprising that a movie about a race of nekkid (well, at least topless) people living on the moon can be soooooo boring." The very first Agony Booth reader submission!

"Voula, seeing that asking to go to the dance right now would probably be greeted with the same reaction as if she asked to get an abortion, begins to weave a ridiculous, fully transparent lie. She talks about how there's a 'meeting' at school on Saturday, to do with the foster child. She even says, I kid you not, 'It's just like school, only in the evening!' It's just like school, only with more drugs and booze and sex! How can you say no?"

The Fantastic Four spend almost the entire film mostly cleaning up after their own mistakes. No joke. Every time they spring into action, it's a direct result of one of them doing something dumb. Didn't this seem like a bad, bad idea to anyone? We watch superhero movies to see the heroes being heroic, not bungling things so badly that they cause massive injuries and property damage, if not outright deaths. They should be saving the day, not covering their own asses.

Despite the obvious similarities to Clonus, which I laid out pretty clearly in my review of The Island, the lawsuit itself was a contentious subject among fans of the two films. Now comes word that the issue has been put to rest, more or less, as has the lawsuit. According to an inside source, Clonus Associates v. DreamWorks was settled out of court in late 2006, reportedly for a seven-figure sum to be paid to Clonus Associates.

I've been promising to do this for years, but for some reason I just never get around to it. Well, I'm sure one reason is the idea of sitting through five awful films in the space of one weekend is enough to make me go, hmm, don't I have some toilet scrubbing to do? But as one of the preeminent Bad Movie-ologists on the web (and by the web, I mean my own mind), I felt it was necessary to at least poke my head up from my steady diet of awful cinema of the '60s, '70s, and '80s. It was time to discover the State of the Bad Movie in 2006.

It's a lesson I've learned time and time again: People will slam movies purely because of who's in them. When forgettable films like Crossroads or Glitter or From Justin to Kelly make it onto the IMDb's list of the 100 worst films of all time, you know people are voting based on the magazine covers at the checkout stand. Same with the films nominated for the Razzie this year. If not for the presence of Sharon Stone, the Wayans brothers, Nicolas Cage, M. Night Shyamalan, and (to a much lesser extent) Uwe Boll, would anybody give two shits about any of these movies? Probably not.

I'll guess I'll spoil things a bit and say that Nicole Stoffman, the actress who plays Steph, only sticks around for the first two seasons. I don't know exactly why she left, but I would imagine being Canada's official national jailbait may have taken its toll. I mean, I doubt there's one straight male viewer of Degrassi who wasn't boning it up while looking at Stephanie Kaye, and I presume being a 14 year old sexpot wasn't the ideal situation for Nicole. Or any girl, for that matter. That's when you start attracting the John Hinckleys of the world.

So it was something of a shock to find out last year that, not only had other people actually seen Degrassi Junior High, but it was now out on DVD. Degrassi was a part of my adolescence that I had always assumed was lost forever, like lazy Sunday afternoons riding bikes to nowhere. This was such a personal thing for me, that the existence of Degrassi on DVD was tantamount to having my brain patterns stored on magnetic disk and replayed twenty years later. It was like someone gave me a chance to drink New Coke again. In fact, it was like someone gave me a limitless supply of 2-liter bottles of the stuff.

Back in '93, when Michael seemed merely eccentric in a Howard Hughes kind of way, "Ghosts" probably would have played better, or at least not utterly horrifying. But given what he's been accused of since then, it's hard to sympathize with him in this video. After all, we learn his character is inviting young boys to his hideaway, and exacting promises from them to keep quiet about what goes on there. Amazingly, this whole "film" is all about why sane adults should not freak out about this.

So here we are, five years later. And yeah, I know that as far as websites go (and even as far as websites making fun of bad movies go), this one is pretty insignificant. But I felt it was appropriate to reflect upon the fifth anniversary of 9/11 in my own way. And while other sites will revisit the memories, the horrors, the highs and lows, here at the Agony Booth, I can think of no better way to mark the occasion than to review the single worst film ever made about those events: DC 9/11: Time of Crisis.