The Flash RECAP: Damn, That's a Cold Ass Honkey (S1:E10)

flash 1.1 publicity shot

Hi, guys! Welcome back! Did you miss me? I missed me. Did you have a productive winter break while not watching hour-long television dramas? Because I caught up on Agents of SHIELD and Agent Carter, and you should be watching both of those. Especially Agent Carter. She is a BAMF. ANYWAY. Previously on The Flash: Barry confronts Reverse Flash, but not to any real end, and Barry tells Iris that he’s in love with her, but not to any real end.

We open with Barry’s voiceover as Flash flees from a drone down a runway at the airstrip Team Flash uses for training. He’s telling us that he’s not the fastest man alive, actually, because Reverse Flash pretty much kicked his ass. But he’s in training with Cisco, Caitlin, and Harrison to remedy that; hence the drone, which is shooting at him. He orders Cisco to “bring it,” and the drone does, in the form of missiles. One takes Barry down, but not out, and he runs at the second missile, catching and redirecting it to blow up the multi-million dollar military-grade drone instead. He then eats about a hundred burgers. Barry wants to go again against drones with lasers, but after determining that Reverse Flash will in fact be called Reverse Flash (Harrison likes it), Caitlin and Harrison veto that idea; Barry’s had enough for one day.

Like outrunning a missile is hard.

Like outrunning a missile is hard.

In a garage featuring a baker’s dozen of cloth-covered cars, a door is mysteriously freezing…and then busting open when a Cadillac drives through it. Hi, Captain Cold! Leonard Snart and his freeze gun have a new partner: the pyromaniac from episode 4, Mick Rory, hopefully to be known as Heat Wave. Mick wants to know how they’re gonna drive all thirteen cars away, but Leonard distractedly says they aren’t stealing anything, since they set off a silent alarm by entering. They just want to draw out the Flash. The cops are in fact en route, but Flash is nowhere to be found so he and Mick pull out.

"But we put on our supervillain outfits and everything!"

“But we put on our supervillain outfits and everything!”

Barry is, though, on-scene at the garage break-in, where nothing has been stolen. He quickly figures out that the steel of the garage door had been frozen before it broke, and Joe easily makes the leap that Cold is back in town. Eddie is unclear on why Leonard would come hang out with a bunch of expensive cars and not steal any of them, but Joe and Barry deduce quickly that it was a trap for Flash.

You know what it says.

Mick is staring creepily at a lighter until Cold calls him on it, and Mick wants to know what they’re stealing next. Cold shows him his laptop screen, which is an article from the Central City Citizen advertising to all potential criminal masterminds that the Rathaways (comic check: Osgood and Rachel Rathaway are super-rich company owners around Central and Keystone Cities and parents of the to-be baddie Pied Piper, Hartley), owners of the “modern-day masterpiece” entitled Fire & Ice (subtle), are returning to Central City with the painting.

"What? We always stand around like this."

“What? We always stand around like this.”

At STARLS, the team is displeased to hear that Cold has returned to Central City with the gun that Cisco built (in case you forgot). Barry thinks that if Leonard wants to draw out the Flash, they should let him, but Harrison is less sure Flash should engage; he might be faster but they shouldn’t risk the collateral damage (Leonard did derail a commuter train last time).

Iris comes into Central City PD to see Eddie and talk about their upcoming move in together. She says she’s never had a roommate (and I wonder more about why Barry got such a classic college experience and Iris did not; though I suppose Barry having a scholarship would explain that well enough) and she’s realized that when she and Eddie fight, she can’t just go home to get away from him. He’s amused that Iris is predicting lots of fights, and to my amusement, she says, “Have you met me?” Barry wanders by looking for Joe so we have an opportunity for Iris to stare after him, pensive, when he goes to find Joe in the Worst Lab Ever.

Joe is looking over Leonard’s case file, but Barry has to break the news that his involvement in the case is done. Joe is not exactly happy about it, and when Barry explains that his priority is training to be faster, Joe reminds him that his whole goal in using his powers has been to help people. Uh-oh, Harrison is not going to be happy when he discovers that Barry’s other dad is undermining his authority. Barry doesn’t bite, though; he just tells Joe that Team Flash will still work with the police to negate the cold gun.

"You mean this hat won't do the trick? It's pretty toasty."

“You mean this hat won’t do the trick? It’s pretty toasty.”

At the West home, Iris is packing for the move with Joe’s help. They have a tender father-daughter moment, and Barry comes over because Iris apparently found something of his—his red-and-yellow pre-Flash backpack, which was in Iris’ closet and contains a “nerd survival kit.” Barry takes out a couple comics, smiling, and Iris heads off to work. Joe of course knows something is wrong between them despite Barry’s protest, and he quickly caves to admit that he told Iris how he felt and now they’re both pretending it didn’t happen. Joe doesn’t have any real wisdom, but he does seem to think it’s better that Barry told her. Then he stares pointedly at Barry until he speedily cleans up the mess of boxes and old crap Iris left in the living room.

Cisco is giving a presentation on his cold gun neutralizing agent to a skeptical group of cops and assorted personnel at the police precinct. They seem to be skeptical about more than just Cisco’s weird device keeping them from being meat popsicles, though—trusting anything out of STAR Labs is difficult when it exploded a year ago. Cisco gives a little speech about making things right and then demonstrates the anti-cold armor with his cold gun prototype. At least a few of the cops are impressed that their revamped ballistic shields do in fact work as promised.

As the milling police folk disperse, Joe and Harrison get straight to chatting about Barry. Harrison pretends that it was all Barry’s decision, but since he uses pretty much the same phrasing Barry did, Joe is not fooled. Harrison has no response to that and wheels off.

At STARLS, Caitlin is googling “Firestorm” (the last thing Ronnie-the-flaming-man said to her) when Barry comes in, and she notices he seems kind of off, so he tells Caitlin that he admitted his true feelings to Iris. This week on OH GOD OH GOD WHY WON’T THIS STORYLINE DIE YOU’RE KILLING ME. Barry says he just doesn’t know where they stand now. Caitlin takes the opportunity to reminisce about how Ronnie spiced up her life, because before they started dating she was very predictable, and at first it was scary that he made her eat Indian food and go scuba diving, but then it became normal. She points out that it wasn’t healthy for Barry to be pining after an oblivious Iris, either. Barry nods to her sage wisdom and starts to turn away, but then realizes that SCUBA is an acronym we treat like a word and maybe Firestorm could be too. Yeah, why don’t you type “scuba” and “s.c.u.b.a.” into google and see if you get different results (spoiler alert: you don’t). But of course F.I.R.E.S.T.O.R.M. immediately brings up a page entitled: “Fusion, Ignition, Research Experience and Science of Transmutation Originating RNA and Molecular Structures,” which, rather like SHIELD, tells me that Professor Martin Stein really wanted the acronym to be FIRESTORM (comic check: Professor Martin Stein is one of the consciousnesses that is or has been involved in the Firestorm matrix, which is actually two or more people bonded together controlling elements). Caitlin notes that it’s 800 pages long, so Barry helpfully reads it for her and reports that it’s mostly about rearranging atoms to get new materials. He also notes that the paper/book/internet manifesto’s coauthor was a grad student at Hudson University in Central City: Jason Rusch (comic check: Jason has also been an inhabitant of the Firestorm matrix, most recently in the New 52 timeline with Ronnie Raymond).

"I'm still just standing around posing, if anyone is interested."

“I’m still just standing around posing, if anyone is interested.”

Meanwhile, the uber-rich Rathaways are emerging from their private jet with the “Fire & Ice” painting. An assistant hesitantly informs Osgood that their son called while they were away, and he resolutely insists they have no son, so maybe we will get the Pied Piper in the future. Before they can even get off the tarmac, though, in a huge surprise to everyone, Cold shows up. The police arrive incredibly quickly while the Rathaways are fleeing (…they are rich, white people, so), and Cold is frustrated that he can’t immediately kill them all as Cisco’s shields do their job. He yells for Mick, who steps forward in a blaze of crazy, driving the cops back with his flamethrower-but-a-gun. Joe manages to fire off a shot through the fire, damaging the gun, and Mick and Leonard retreat.

Mick’s repairing his gun in the fledgling Rogues’ hideaway, but Leonard is more concerned with how he gets all overexcited about fire and forgets their plans. They point their respective extreme guns at one another while Mick counters that he may be a pyromaniac, but Leonard is the one obsessed with Flash. Cold’s argument is that the only potential foil to their city-wide domination is the Flash, so if they can just take him out, there are no obstacles anywhere. Mick agrees to give it another try, then sets the Fire & Ice painting on fire, which probably increases its value in a postmodern sort of way.

Caitlin meets the (adorable) grad student Jason Rusch at Iris’ coffee shop, but as soon as she brings up FIRESTORM, Jason closes off and has somewhere very important to be. Caitlin is persuasive, though, and they talk. Jason reveals that they’d had some early success with their trials, so Stein had jumped them ahead to melting a concrete wall. The university freaked out and shut down the FIRESTORM project, so Stein (and Rusch, presumably) posted the paper online without permission and went looking for private funding. And…then Stein disappeared. And the Army took all their research (except the 800 pages of it posted online?). After the meeting, Caitlin is reading about Stein’s disappearance on her phone in a dark parking lot when Leonard freezes her car from behind her. She, for some reason, tries to open the door anyway, and Mick grabs her. That’s one way to draw out the Flash!

THE FLASH RECAP: Damn, That's a Cold Ass Honkey (S1:E10)

“This should ‘pose’ a problem for the Flash!”

Barry is moping at STARLS when Harrison emerges creepily from the shadows, wondering if Barry blames him for not allowing Flash to help the police. Barry says he’s an adult and makes his own choices. They have a cute paternal moment that’s actually not creepy except for we know Harrison’s hiding a lot of shit, but Cisco breaks it up to report on the flame gun—and to officially name Mick Heat Wave. They realize that the two guns would cancel each other out if the streams were crossed (yes, they acknowledge the Ghostbusters reference), and Barry calls in to report to Joe, who, given how quickly Barry leaves, informs him that they’d found Caitlin’s car.

Back at the precinct, Eddie has pulled Mick’s file from fingerprints found at one of the crime scenes, finally identifying Leonard’s new partner. Before they can use that information for anything useful, though, Leonard takes over the local airwaves to challenge Flash to a showdown with Caitlin struggling in the background.

"Yeah, this is a thing I can do now, apparently."

“Yeah, this is a thing I can do now, apparently.”

Mick is being all creepy pyro at Caitlin, who is having none of his shit and is definitely not playing damsel in distress. But it’s time to go meet Flash so they leave her wired to a bomb.

Leonard and Mick walk dramatically down the sidewalk and gear up while Flash runs dramatically blur-like to the showdown point. They square off, and the guns flash in pretty colors while Barry looks resolute. He dodges their first few efforts, but Leonard successfully gets him to run into an iceberg created by rupturing and freezing the water from a hydrant. Of course, Iris shows up and is somehow allowed through the police line to hang out with Eddie, because the police are definitely cool with civilian bloggers/girlfriends in their midst at an active, dangerous crime scene.

"It's cool that I brought my girlfriend, right?"

“It’s cool that I brought my girlfriend, right?”

Meanwhile, Joe and Cisco are tracking down Caitlin at the Rogues’ warehouse. Cisco, of course, immediately hits the bomb’s tripwire, but Joe already sees it happening and tackles Caitlin away, because he’s the best. They’re all okay.

Barry has decided to run up the side of a nearby building because he, Mick, and Leonard have only caused a dozen cars and a fire hydrant’s worth of property damage so far. Apparently he’s also going outside the area the police had evacuated, so Captain Singh orders them to expand the perimeter. Good job, Barry.

Is anyone else thinking of the 1960s Batman TV show? Just me?

Is anyone else thinking of the 1960s Batman TV show? Just me?

Eddie tells Singh that they can’t let this spread, just as Flash runs into Cold’s beam (not a euphemism). Leonard and Mick advance on the downed Flash, but just as they co-shoot him, Eddie plops down in front of him with one of Cisco’s shields.

"Thanks, Eddie. But we're about to discover that if you had just stayed the fuck over there, this fight would have been over right now."

“Thanks, Eddie. But we’re about to discover that if you had just stayed the fuck over there, this fight would have been over right now.”

Barry speeds Eddie to safety, breath recovered, and over comms he and Harrison realize that to get Mick and Leonard to cross the streams, he needs to move slower. So he lets them hit him this time, allowing the streams to cross over him. I’ve heard better ideas, Barry. It works, though, as eventually the cold/hot beams seem to feedback through one another, throwing Mick and Leonard back dramatically and (probably) damaging their guns. Leonard stretches for his gun, but Flash’s foot comes down on it. Leonard has to admit that Barry won this time. Barry says there won’t be a next time (comic check: unlikely) as Eddie comes up beside him, gun drawn. Flash thanks him and speeds off.

Sometimes heroes get to stand around looking like badasses too.

Sometimes heroes get to stand around looking like badasses too.

The precinct is applauding as Singh leads in uniformed officers with Mick and Leonard in tow, and Cisco packs up the guns to be locked away in STAR Labs and surely never seen again (comic check: unlikely). Captain Singh thanks him for the help with the shields, and Barry grins while listening to uniforms discuss the Flash’s exploits.

At the West home, Eddie and Barry are moving out the last of Iris’ boxes. Eddie tries to reassure Joe by telling him that he can come by anytime, if he gives them a heads-up. When Joe glares at him, Eddie quickly amends that to actually whenever, and then offers a key. Joe’s dad-stare is the best. Eddie escapes with the last box, and Joe leaves Barry and Iris alone in the entry. Barry admits things have been weird, which Iris agrees with. Barry makes her laugh by claiming he can see the future, but is then really kinda sweet, saying that he sees her and Eddie being happy and things not being weird anymore with just some time. Iris asks Joe if he can take a photo of her and Barry from the coffee table, then hugs him and fist-bumps Barry before heading out. After ten seconds of experiencing empty nest syndrome, Joe convinces Barry to move back home, and Barry does. Right then. Super-speedily. It’s incredibly adorable, you guys; have I mentioned a time or three dozen how much I love Joe and Barry’s relationship?

Mick and Leonard are being transported to Iron Heights by armored vehicle, and Mick is not happy about it. Before Leonard can try to convince Mick that he has a meta-plan, the vehicle comes to an abrupt stop, which, turns out, is part of the plan. The back of the van opens, and Leonard grins and says, “hey, sis.” SUP, GLIDER!

Her super power is ice skates. Really.

Her super power is ice skates. Really.

TV Show: The Flash

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  • Historicat

    “(comic check: unlikely)” bwa ha ha!